Teachers Pick their Noses

Teachers Pick their Noses

£5.99

And for all you fainthearted souls out there that are feeling queasy at the mere thought of your teacher digging for bogeys – don’t panic! This collection also includes lots of ‘non-bogey’ poems. There are poems about footballing hedgehogs; flea-ridden pirates; chocolate cakes that take over the world; a girl who can’t stop sleeping; and the long awaited return of My Silly Daddy. Not to mention the Recycle Monster living in the garden shed.

Product Description

Have you ever seen your teacher picking their nose? I bet you haven’t. But the truth is it’s their favourite thing to do in the whole world. In fact, if nose picking was an Olympic sport, teachers would win all the gold medals. Read this book and discover what your teachers REALLY get up to when you’re out in the playground.

3 reviews for Teachers Pick their Noses

  1. :

    ‘If he’s written another poem about me, he’ll not be getting any pocket money for 100 years’ – Conrad’s mum

  2. :

    ‘I’ve never picked my nose in all my life. How disgusting. I’m a headteacher for goodness’ sake. I wouldn’t dream of doing such a thing’ – Mrs Moore

  3. :

    ‘I’ll be there in a minute. I’m just…going…to……zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz…’ – Sleepy Sue

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What makes me different?

    • Fun and engaging
    • Over 10 years’ experience
    • DBS certified
    • Nursery – Year 6
    • Poet, Storyteller and Writer
    • Teacher trainer
    • Visited over 200 schools

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Written by my friend, Peter Robinson, for my birthday today. It's flipping brilliant! ... See MoreSee Less

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I'm at Castleford Library waiting to do a storytelling workshop. The three crowd members so far are rather familiar😀.

I ran some workshops here last summer. One of the boys who came was called Peter. He attended as part of his Children's University course where he had to do 1000 hours. At the end he'd to pick his favourite moment.

He picked my workshop. How special do I feel?!
... See MoreSee Less

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Facebook keeps reminding me of our 40th last year. In light of that, plus the fact that I have a poetry book to write by the end of the month, here's a poem about mi twin bruv, Phil.

My identical twin

I'm his twin and he's my twin
And when I lose it means he wins
And when he wins it means I lose
And we both have the same sized shoes

I'm his twin and he's my twin
My face is round his face is thin
My waist is big his waist is small
We're both six and a bit feet tall

I'm his twin and he's my twin
On stage he's shy on stage I sing
He writes with left I write with right
At maths we've always both been bright

I'm his twin and he's my twin
Our brother's Ol our mum is Lynne
In photos taken years ago
Which twin is which? Nobody knows

I'm his twin and he's my twin
I'm like his yang and he's my yin
I know his thoughts he knows mine too
We're miles apart yet stick like glue

I'm his twin and he's my twin
It's really quite a glorious thing
For 40 years we've been this way
I wouldn't change a single day

(Except the day he broke a snooker cue on my back...)
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Mabel keeps telling me about the 'turtle on my knee' in the song Attention. I couldn't believe that was right, but she assured me it was. I've just looked it up - 'throwin' that dirt all on my name' isn't nearly as good as Mabel's invention 😀 ... See MoreSee Less

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Check out Wakefield Libraries getting in on the rhymes! Good work 😀 ... See MoreSee Less

You know that you'll have a great time With story and rhythm and rhyme, When Conrad is here- He's due to appear on the stroke of the two o'clock chime! Conrad Burdekin! enjoy a great afternoon of fun with words.

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